Run, little fella. Run for your life!
Won't be much longer, boy.
We'll find us a blacksmith in town, you'll be as good as new.
You shootin' at somebody, or somebody shootin' at you?
I just killed a rattler.
Why?
He was about to eat hisself a baby rabbit.
Snake don't get him, somethin' else will.
Maybe, but I reckon it's nice for a fella to live as long as he can.
- Even if he's a rabbit. - What about the snake?
- Well, snakes is a different thing. - Is they?
Anything happening in Silver City?
Usual
"usual" don't mean much to me. I ain't never been there.
So, is anything happening?
- Man: You just asked that, Sonny. - So he asked it again.
Eh, a new gal's comin' into town on a late stage.
Gonna work at Mamie's.
They stuck the picture she sent up over the bar.
She looks like her picture, she's somethin' special.
Every man in town's turned out to meet her.
Thing is, Mamie thinks this new gal don't know
what kinda job she signed up for.
She don't know, it's gonna be a joke on her!
Son, Mamie's ain't no flower shop!
Do you know somebody in Silver?
Nope.
Then, if I was you, I'd untie them guns.
Folks around there kinda Eastern. They don't kowtow to strangers
walkin' around with a steel strapped tight.
Well, I ain't no stranger round these parts.
Neither is thunder and lightnin'.
These folks been known to make exceptions.
Like I say, if I was you,
I'd untie 'em.
Silver ain't no place for a kid.
You just come from there.
I just come through there!
And I ain't no kid!
He ain't no kid!
That's the best one I heard since Hangtown. He ain't no kid!
You got a spell to tack a shoe on my animal? Well, I got the shoe.
Sorry, boy, I'm just fixin' to join the fun.
Can you find time for a dollar?
A dollar? You're in Silver City, boy.
Just a dollar might buy ya a nail.
I was only kiddin', son.
How's if I shoe all fours for two dollars fifty?
Just bother with the one for seventy-five cents, and, er...
Use the same shoe.
Mind you take care of my Winchester.
I seen one of them things before, Sonny.
Hi there, honey...
- New boy, Seth. - Hell, ed, I seen him.
- Evening, sir... - Hold your horses, customer.
I'm about to have breakfast.
Well, son, put your boot on the rail. That's what it's for.
Passin' through here, stranger?
Maybe.
Then again, I might take a hankerin' to your town.
You do that, son, you best untie them pistols you're totin'.
Nobody said nothin' to you out there in the street?
Ain't nobody out there fit to say nothin'.
Well, mr Ed's right, boy.
We got strict laws here in Silver.
Now, we don't mind a little hoorah now and then, and...
Well, this here house keeps stock of what the fellas want,
their whiskey and all, but, er...
But serious gun-totin's another thing.
I guess we all seen too much shootin' not long back.
So much so, we've run plumb out of sherriffs.
Temporarily.
I hear tell you folks make exceptions now and then.
You got good ears, boy.
Ride into a young fella, just at sunset, up on the hill,
and that's sure what he told me.
This here young fella ridin' alone?
Nope, he had a couple fellas taggin' with him.
This here your friend from on the hill?
The spittin' image!
Well, I'll be damned.
Yeah, we make exceptions to Billy Pimple.
He ain't quite Billy the kid, but he sure workin' on it.
And he's jealous of him, too, which makes it worse.
Billy Pimple's got a disposition like a rattlesnake in the sun.
This here wanted sign was hung up pretty as you please
on that wall over there.
It had to be. It's the law.
I always nail Billy's pictures as far as I can tack 'em from the bar, but, er...
Makes no difference where I stick 'em.
He still gets sore.
Him and them two sidewinders of his come in here about five o'clock,
had one whiskey.
Then, Billy spots the picture through the mirror,
just starts shootin'.
Cleared the place out before I had time to duck behind the bar.
Then, he runs out in the street,
invites the whole town in here to have a drink.
Invites the whole town in for a drink at the end of a gun.
On the house.
That's what started that whole mess out there.
Our folks was gonna be real gentlemen, to meet the new girl, until...
Billy comes to town.
Time he left, they...
They was all so drunk they could hardly follow him
out in the street to wave goodbye.
To wave goodbye? Do they like him?
Hell, no, they don't like him.
But they don't dislike him, if you get what I mean.
So, junior, if you can't shoot like Billy, we can't...
Now, Seth, don't you go startin' somethin'.
- Are them real guns? - Now, c'mon, fellas!
- Hey! What's goin' on down here?
- I thought for a minute it was Billy Pimple.
I didn't mean to disturb you.
Buster, we been all through that before.
Yeah, we thought there were some more free drinks.
This here boy is better and faster than Billy.
Well, he sure keeps his bullets to himself.
You can wear them tie-downs just as is, mister.
We ain't gonna try and stop ya.
Hey! Here, come on, giddup there!
Come on! Move outta the way there!
Clear away there! Look out for the stage!
Get outta the way there!
Whoa there! Whoa!
All right, easy, easy, boys! Let the little lady out!
Come on out there, honey. Don't be afraid.
- Come on, fellas! She's just a kid!
She won't be no kid after tonight!
I thought you had some laws in this town.
Ain't no laws when the whole town's drunk.
- My, my, what a pretty woman!
- C'mon, boys, let's give him a hand outta there!
Let's help him outta there! He looks a little weak to me.
All right, fellas! Help him outta there!
Hold it!
You drunken sots!
Don't you touch one hair of that little gal's head!
She's mine! Do you understand that? Mine!
I'm a-comin' out to get ya, Nellie! Don't you fret!
You don't have to work until tomorrow!
Where ya headin', boy?
I'm gonna ride them men away from that coach.
They're gonna hurt that girl!
Evening, Claude. I see you brung your brother.
Orville, you're drunk!
- No, your saddle's loose!
You boys is actin' like rabbits. Relax.
There's gonna be enough for everybody.
Evenin', parson.
You oughta have a full house for sure next Sunday.
Grab her!
Look here, girl,
I'm pickin' you up!
Ha! Help me, girl!
Oh, good boy! Go to it, son!
- Keep on ridin'! - Jack her away!
Will one of you bums do somethin'?
What the hell are you laughin' at?
I was just hopin' they might fall off.
Ah, get in!
- What a night! What a night! - Wowee! What a night!
- How do your legs feel now?
I don't know.
That's the first time I've ever been on a horse.
Yeah, well, you weren't on one, much.
Yeah.
Do you know where we are?
Nope, I just know where we ain't.
That was getting narrower than hell.
Do you think they'll come after us?
There ain't nobody in Silver tonight fit to sit a horse.
Now, look.
Didn't ya figure when that Mamie person
wrote for a picture, somethin' wasn't just right?
I mean, you don't have to look like you
to wait on tables.
I guess I just wanted so hard for everything to be right, I didn't think.
I've had so much trouble finding a decent job anyplace.
Well, for gosh sakes, why?
Well, a decent job doesn't always mean
that the menfolks'll stay decent.
Yeah, well, whatever that means.
How old are you?
Somewhere close to twenty, pa told me.
I am twenty.
Do you, er... Do you know where we're headed?
I don't rightly know.
Well, don't you live just back there?
Not just back there, way back there.
I seen Silver City for the first time only a little while before you did.
Why did you take this chance?
There was two good reasons.
First, you was in a heap of trouble...
We're still in trouble. We don't even know where we're going.
That's right. But there's somewhere sure ahead.
Stagecoach come down this road.
Had to come from some place.
So we'll just keep on.
And the other reason?
The other reason was...
I guess you're the prettiest girl I ever seen.
I didn't want none of them fellas touchin' you.
- Oh, hell, come on in!
Buenos dias, your honour. The sun's up.
Come here, boy! Take care o' that!
You nailed there, boy?
Take care of that jug now!
Yes, sir. But you told me last night to remind you, first thing,
that today's a big day. You know, the horse thief.
Horse thief? Today's Wednesday, is it?
I plumb near forgot about it.
Boy, fetch me my good coat.
Oh, my!
No, no! I said the good one!
A new couple checked in to town.
- Early this morning. - Yeah, how new?
Brand new. They ain't much older than me. I seen 'em.
Hey, they sign up as mister and missus?
Well, did they?!
I'm only gonna give you a nickel.
'Cause you ain't worth a dime when you're only givin' me half facts.
You fetch me cauliflower and rankin, right now!
You hurry with that jug!
- Yes, sir.
Oh, my!
Oh, my. Wednesday. Oh, me.
Cauliflower! Rankin!
The judge wants to see you both. Right away!
And he's sober!
Throw 'em out.
- All right, girlie, get dressed.
I am dressed!
That ain't neither here nor there.
- You're both goin' with us. - For what?
We got a little law here in Vinegaroon called "indecent conduct",
and you two just broke it.
Here together in this nice hotel.
Why, you ain't even registered as man and wife.
Hear ye! Hear ye! Hear ye!
This honourable court is just about to be in session.
Any of you boys want another snort before I begin to work, get it now!
Bring Sonny out here!
All right!
All right! Shut up and sit down!
Well...
Good mornin', Sonny.
Mornin', judge.
Do you mind just steppin' around here, please, Sonny?
Sonny boy...
You was brought in here for borrowin' another fella's horse
without him knowin' it, hmm?
Now, it's my duty as the law of this fair city
to pass judgement and speak my verdict.
Sonny, time will pass, the seasons will come and go.
Summer, with its shimmerin' heatwaves that bake to rise,
and then fall...
With a yellow harvest moon
and the hills all turnin' golden under the sinkin' sun.
And then winter, with a bitin', whinin' wind,
in a land all mantled over, white with snow, and then...
Spring again.
Spring, with the green grass blowin' gently in the breeze,
and heaps of sweet wild flowers on top of every hill.
But you won't be here to see none of it!
Because you're in this court right now!
And you'll be took out of here up on that hill,
and be hanged by the neck till you're dead! Dead! Dead!
Now, get him outta here!
Now, you boys got just one minute
'fore I start the next case.
Roy, you know that stranger we found dead
from natural causes in the hotel yesterday?
Well, I spent ten dollars buildin' his box.
Well, that's your job, Milton, ain't it?
My job is to stick 'em underground,
but I shouldn't have to pay for it.
Milton, you told me all that last night,
but the main fact is, I was so drunk
I forgot to ask you what you found on that poor fella.
I mean, now look, Milton, weren't he carryin' nothin'?
- Well, er... nothin' much. - Like?
Well, like, er...
- Thirty-seven bucks and a gun. - Thirty-seven?
Why, Milton, that's withholdin' evidence!
- Well, I was gonna tell you about it... - You was gonna have to!
Oh, hell, it don't make no difference, Milton.
But the law is the law, so let's just fine that corpse, say, um...
Thirty-seven dollars for carryin' a gun without a permit.
And, Milton...
You can turn the money over to city treasury right now.
And you can buy that gun from the city for two bucks later.
Later?
Later, Milton.
And don't you be frettin' about the money you spent on that box,
because we're gonna play some poker later on,
and you'll get a chance to win it back.
All right! Come on, now! Sit down! All of you, sit down and be quiet.
We're gonna have some order in this here courtroom.
I said "quiet!"
Now, bring in the next offender.
Now, what the devil did you two kids do to get in all this trouble?
- Well, sir... - These was the two in the hotel.
Well, was you or wasn't you?
Yes, sir.
You got a legal certificate of marriage?
We just met last night.
Fast worker, huh, son?
When these two come at me, I was outside the room.
Well, was he or wasn't he? Speak up, boys!
When I first seen him, he was inside that room.
Answer me, boy. Are you two married?
No, sir.
- Now, where's my box? Er... - Right in there, your honour.
Step forward, girl.
Pick out the ring you want. It's your weddin'.
Come on, girl, hurry up!
Don't act like a woman. My time is valuable.
Now, do you two take... What's your name?
- Nellie Winters. - Cass Bunning.
Huh. Well, do you, Cass Bunning, take each other as lawful wedded spouses,
to honour and respect from this time forward,
in sickness and in health, till death do you part?
- Well, do ya?! - Well...
I now pronounce you man and wife.
Stick the ring on her finger, boy, and kiss her,
and may God have mercy on your souls.
Oh yeah, I got a surprise for you.
You two young folks are gonna be the guests of our fine hotel.
Ain't gonna cost you a cent. And, boys...
Tomorrow, I'm gonna stick a new sign up in the hotel that says,
"spend your honeymoon in Vinegaroon!"
Yessir, boy, your room's gonna be on the house.
But this here weddin' I've just performed
is gonna set you back five bucks.
And, girl, you can give me back that ring.
You'll find a better one somewhere later on, I'm sure.
Now, then, let's give a big hand for the newlyweds, huh?
That's all. Get outta here.
Now, you boys have got exactly one short minute to wet your whistles
before we go onto the next case.
Cass!
- We musta walked both our legs off.
- Doesn't seem long.
It's been hours, and we ain't said a word.
Neither of us.
Well, where shall we begin?
Guess I don't have to pick petals no more.
Looks like I'm already spoken for.
- Are you sorry? - I ain't nothin'.
Maybe I'm mostly glad you're like you are.
Thing like this could be downright awful.
I meant that nice.
I mean...
It ain't bad at all, with you.
Well, I guess we're really married.
Well, I ain't never seen nothin' more legal.
Cass!
- I guess it's just a hunk o' wood.
Folks die every place in the world,
and way up here's the only cool breeze around town.
Do men always think like that?
I mean, straight out with their feeling?
The only man I ever knowed well was pa.
I hope I thinks like he does.
- My ma died a while back. - So did mine.
Then my dad.
I guess bein' a girl and havin' your ma die
would be just like it would be with me if somethin' was to happen to pa.
I'm gonna take you home to my pa.
- He needs you while I'm gone. - Gone?
I got things to do.
This ain't the time to explain 'em.
Nellie, we're in real trouble.
They got all my money but two dollars.
They got my saddle and my guns,
and we ain't goin' no place without my horse.
That hotel ain't safe for you tonight.
Can't tell what them drunks is liable to pull.
- Hey, you two!
Crawl on up here, and we'll visit for a spell.
That's right, come a-runnin'.
I was a little out of sorts this mornin'.
I reckon maybe I was just a little bit crabby, ya know?
Crawbread.
Dang it!
Man tries to stay ahead of progress,
so he can make an honest livin',
and progress can't never catch up to him.
I ride up here every mornin' to see if them railroad fellas
stuck that track down any closer.
They said they'd be comin' right by here,
more'n a month ago, when I stuck up my town.
Hell's fire!
I can't even see the smoke from their train,
which they probably ain't even got.
Gettin' so you just can't trust nobody nowadays.
Now, don't go frettin' yourself about Sonny.
That's the second horse he borrowed without askin'.
It was bound to happen sooner or later.
You know, kids now,
they figure they got the right to anything they want
just 'cause they're young.
Hell, just bein' young don't give you that right.
Now, a wild bunch out in California hanged me once when I was young.
My gal Cherita,
whose fault the whole mess was all about,
she cut me down after her folks thought I was a goner.
Shoulda stayed hung. I wasn't much good when I was young.
Girl.
Girl, come over here! Come on, girl!
Come on over here!
So, er...
Your name is Nellie, yeah?
I got me a sweetheart by the name, pretty closely.
You hear tell of miss Lillie Langtry?
My pa has, your honour. He's seen her.
Where? New York? Chicago? San Francisco?
- That's sure where, judge. - Well, I'll be damned.
Only other fella I ever met who knowed her
just happened to see her passin' by in a train once.
Say, I reckon your pa thinks like I do, that miss Lillie Langtry
is the greatest actress in the whole world, huh?
And the prettiest.
Yeah, well, your pa's a smart fella.
'Course, most everyone thinks that.
Any of your family ever seen her, girl?
Girl!
Now, you two bein' married, I reckon maybe
somebody in your family's seen her, too.
No, they haven't seen her, but they read a lot.
Well, hell, I should think so.
I'm gonna build me a town someday, and I'm gonna name it after her.
Langtry, Texas, it's gonna be known as.
That little old camp town ain't good enough
for a man of my education.
I'm gonna build me a real city, with a real courthouse,
where I can practise law, and...
I'm gonna name it after her.
Langtry, Texas...
Come on, mule. Oh, er...
Like I said, you kids ain't got nothin' to worry about.
You gonna just be our guests for the night,
and be happy.
Ain't gonna cost ya a cent.
Oh, and boy,
by the time you've walked down this hill,
you will find your saddle and your guns in your room.
I sure wanna thank you for tellin' me about your pa.
Means a heap to me.
Now, I been in love with miss Lillie Langtry for...
Oh, for ever, I guess.
But I ain't never seen her.
He's just a little boy.
An old, old little boy.
Yeah?
Well, he sure didn't let that Sonny fella get any older.
And he didn't give me back my five bucks, neither.
The carpenter has fixed your door. Good and new!
The boss is givin' a fiesta tonight for a coupla newly-marrieds.
Reckon you'll be there.
There ain't no way out.
- You got yourself quite some boss. - The best around!
Look, Nellie...
I don't know nothin' about bein' married.
Well, why don't we start by just opening the door?
Yeah, well...
Oh, look!
"Spend your honeymoon in Vinegaroon!"
You'd better close that door before everybody in town's looking in here.
Help me, please.
Help me.
- One! Two! Three!
Again! Ready...
One! Two! Three!
Why doesn't that other man ever get hit?
So far, he's never lost.
Look, closed fists like this means "rocks",
hands flat out means "paper",
and two fingers straight out means "scissors".
- Ready? - One! Two! Three!
Wow!
Now, watch. It's simple.
Pa and I used to play this game.
'Course, we never played it thataway before.
We used to do it like this.
- Ow! - Now, look, here's the rules.
Rocks break scissors, scissors cut paper,
paper wraps rocks.
One of them fellas always loses, unless it's a tie.
Then they just go at it again, until one of them loses.
And it's always the one they call cauliflower?
- He always loses.
I reckon Rankin's got the Indian side on him!
- Ready? - One! Two! Three!
Throw him in the water!
Hey, kid!
More cake!
And you can have some yourself!
I just love seein' my people have good, clean, rough fun.
I give these here shindigs every time I get a chance.
And Cauliflower always loses?
Oh, hell, no, he won once. About, er...
Four months ago. Nearly killed Rankin.
Damn near had to drown him to bring him to!
Ladies and gentlemen!
Before we start this evenin's dancin',
I wanna dedicate a drop of this fine whiskey
to the prettiest girl in the whole wide world.
Ladies and gentlemen,
here's to miss Lillie Langtry!
- Lillie Langtry!
Start the music!
You wanna be a chair?
I'd be scared not to!
- Change partners!
You'd better dance a turn or two with Lilly,
and then you can trade her in for some other fella's gal.
Oh, it's no joke.
The judge thinks Lilly keeps the fiesta goin'.
And I'll tell ya somethin' else.
Lillie Langtry sat on this very chair.
The judge bought it from some show fella in Chicago.
- My head aches. - You're lucky.
I ache all over.
I musta got stuck dancin' with that darned chair more'n 100 times.
You two did look pretty together.
We looked just as pretty as you did,
swingin' around all night with his honour.
He's not all bad.
I think he's only mean when he's drunk or has a hangover.
Well, that just gives him 24 hours a day to be mean.
He didn't have to give me this horse.
That there weddin' present you're ridin' belonged to Sonny.
- What? - Pepe told me.
Why didn't they give him back to the owner?
Nobody knows who the owner is.
That kid just came into town ridin' that horse,
so's they figured he stole it.
And judge Bean hung him for that?
His honour's your friend.
Cass?
When you leave me with your dad, where are you going?
I think I have a right to know.
I mean, we're not just a mistake anymore.
Or are we?
No, Nellie, that's sure not the way I think.
Well...
I guess my pa's the fastest draw and the deadest shot in the whole world.
Well, er...
Reason I can tell you, is on account of
he teach me everything I know.
And, Nellie, that's all I know.
Guns, I mean.
Nothin' wrong. I mean, I ain't goin' against the law.
There's posters out on a bunch of fellas,
like Jesse and Frank James, and Billy the Kid,
and even that other Billy.
Them posters, they offer lots of money.
Well, I'm fast enough and good enough to bring them fellas in.
Dead, or alive.
You're going out after Jesse James?
Heck, no! Sure, not Jesse! He rides with a whole bunch.
But sure 'nuff that Billy Pimple.
I met up with him just 'fore I seen you.
He ain't nothin', Nellie.
Why, when pa told me about them fellas,
I figured them to be strong and handsome and ten foot tall,
but, gosh, that Billy's just a little squirt.
That Billy's just as big as his guns!
Cass, if your dad was such a great hand with a gun,
why didn't he turn bounty hunter?
- I'd bet you'd ask that. - Well?
Nelly, you're just gonna have to get to know my pa
'fore I can explain him and how he is.
Well, why don't you try?
After all, I am going home to live with him.
Look, for instance,
a few years back, a fella stopped by our farm.
Said he wanted a drink of whiskey.
We didn't have none in the house then,
and pa told him so.
Well, he got mad,
and stepped off his horse and challenged pa.
Ma and me just stood in the doorway and didn't say nothin',
while pa went in the house and strapped on his guns.
Mm-hmm.
Soon as he come out, him and this fella faced off.
Then, a funny thing happened.
All of a sudden, pa sticks his hands up in the air,
and tells this stranger to draw on him.
Well, he did.
Pa just turned his back, and reaches down
flipped his own two guns in the dirt,
and walked away.
This fella called my pa a lot of bad names,
but pa just stood there.
After some more name-callin',
this fella just got back up on his horse, and rode away.
Turns out this fella was Wes Hardin.
Pa knowed it all along.
Later on, he told me he didn't draw on him on account of ma.
But I always figured he plumb didn't wanna kill nobody.
Even a top gunman like Wes Hardin.
My pa's too good a man, Nellie.
Too kind.
Well, that's his problem.
And I guess that answers your question.
Yes, cass.
We'll find us a good spot later on,
and I'll prove to you how good I can shoot.
You'll be surprised.
Well?
I didn't think anybody could shoot like that.
Well, pa says there ain't many who can.
He's the only one I ever seen,
but, heck, all them fellas I told you about
can shoot maybe as good as or better than me.
There ain't no way of tellin', yet.
Now, I always figured it was mostly a matter of luck,
but ma used to say it was only god's will
who lives and dies in this world.
And that's a chance I gotta take. Like I told ya,
guns is all I know.
But now, we're married.
- I didn't ask for that. - Neither did I!
Well, what do I do now, huh?
Throw these guns away and pick up pa's plough
just because, all of a sudden, I got myself a wife?
I don't care what you do.
You just go ahead, and let those poster fellas
blow your fat head off, if that's what you want.
And they will. Any one of 'em.
Well, where do you think you're goin', Mrs Bunning?
It's my horse, and I'm gonna ride him
as far away as I can from the greatest gunfighter in the west.
Nellie!
Nellie? I'm surprised you remember my name!
I thought I was "Mrs Bunning".
Look, I don't know what to say.
Well, why don't you say,
just once,
that you love me?
- I'd choke. - Well, I love you.
So do I, but that ain't easy to say.
There, you see? You just said it.
- I sure like happy endings!
Son, you please throw those two colts out on the ground in front of ya.
Toss that gun belt out a little bit further.
Now, drop your pants.
Well, that pretty little lady there's your girlfriend, isn't she?
She's my wife!
Then that's all the more reason you oughta do what I ask.
You sure now wouldn't want her to be your widow, would ya?
Do like he says.
You were real handy with those guns.
You got a fine rhythm.
We heard you when you first started shooting,
so we rode down to watch.
Where'd you learn to shoot like that?
My pa taught me.
- Your pa a lawman? - My pa's a farmer.
That's quite a waste.
'Scuse me, ma'am.
I was so impressed with your husband here that, er...
I almost forgot my manners.
- Good morning. - Good morning.
Er... son, what are you gonna do with all that ability?
I was just showin' Nellie how I could shoot.
I'm gonna go home, be a farmer with my pa.
If that was the truth,
it'd be another waste. But, er...
You're not a very good liar.
Let's see your hands, son.
Look at how your palms are sweating.
Now, look at mine.
You see? There's a difference.
That difference, boy, just might mean your life.
You could be the best shot in the world,
but you can't handle guns with your hands all wet with sweat.
Nerves, nothing else.
In time, the greenness wears off, but...
Right now, you're not worth very much.
Look, mister. If you're trying to frighten us,
you're not doing a very good job.
Now, we don't have any money, and you don't need our horses,
so what do you want?
By jiggers, young lady, you're something.
Now, if you could shoot like your husband,
I'd invite you to join up with us right now.
You make Belle Starr look like a nun.
Couple of other things, youngster.
Don't ever leave your rifle on your horse.
And the next time you feel like practising,
pick yourself a spot up on a hill,
so you can have a chance to look around.
Down here in a gully like this,
you and that pretty little wife of yours
are like sitting ducks for anyone that happens by.
Where you headed?
I'm goin' to my pa's farm.
On past Silver City.
Well, you two ride around Silver.
We just came through there, and I got a feeling trouble's brewin'.
Now, the reason I've spent this time talking to you is,
I think you're gonna be about as happy being a farmer
as I would have been.
So, when you change your mind, you look me up.
I could use a bright boy like you, with your talents.
I can't look you up, sir, if I don't know who you are.
Well, I guess that's the way we all get
when there's been a little talk about us.
We just automatically think everybody knows who we are.
That's my brother, Frank, over there.
Hello, folks.
- My cousin, Bobby Ford.
Howdy!
And my name's Jesse.
Now, we'll leave the animals over there a ways.
No telling just how good you could shoot that rifle if you took a notion.
You understand, a man in my position can't take chances.
Even with kids.
Now, like I said, you two ride around Silver.
And, boy,
when you get tired of being a farmer,
look me up.
Jesse James. Well, that even beats Vinegaroon.
That fine weddin' gift your friend gave ya
might just not make it all the way to the ranch.
- Don't move nothin'!
Gimme that comb.
Only safe way to pry ya loose.
This here's cholla.
Jumpin' cactus.
Don't really jump, but it sure moves around.
Barbs get stuck underneath the horse,
it don't take long for it to roll over its whole belly.
The more he bucks, the more it rolls.
Won't shake loose.
Pa lost one of his best horses with this darn stuff.
Bucked hisself clean off the ranch,
half across the river, drowned.
'Course, he was worse than you.
He was stupid enough to back hisself down on a whole bush.
Ouch! That hurts!
You think it sticks?
You oughta small how it stinks when it burns.
Pa and I got the bright idea one year
to burn all the cholla off the ranch.
Ma just up and moved to Silver,
stayed one full week.
Then, she didn't speak to neither one of us
for another full week once she got back.
It was awful.
Smell of that stuff burnin', I mean.
Come on.
Build us a fire, and...
Heat some water, and get that leg of yours washed clean.
Then we can have some coffee.
Jesse James.
Well...
Jesse and Frank rode with Quantrill durin' the war.
Pa says Quantrill was the bloodiest man in history.
He knows them things.
Anyhow, Jesse was only sixteen then,
but he musta learned a lot.
Pa says he still busts a town like a Quantrill raid.
Seven or eight of his bunch ride down main street,
and start hurrahin' with their guns and horses,
acting like they was drunk.
Then, while all the folks is careerin' for cover,
couple of 'em open up the bank.
It sure works.
One day, the James boys busted open three towns
in the same afternoon.
Great thing was that the towns were more than a thousand miles apart.
Oh, Cass, you know that's impossible.
Nope, it ain't.
I didn't say Jesse and Frank was in all them towns.
They wasn't.
They wasn't any more than they're gonna be in Silver, if that's your idea.
But their boys might be.
Sometimes, nowadays, they just tell the boys where everything is,
and what to do about it.
They got a real plan.
Why, there must be ten thousand dollars in that bank in Silver.
Then we'd better do like he said and go around Silver City.
Nope, Nellie. We're gonna ride close.
Somewhere.
All my life, I've been listenin' and never doin'.
I sure ain't about to get myself mixed up in a mess if there is one,
but, by golly, if there is one,
I'm sure gonna see it.
Oh, cass!
Well, would you feel better just comin' out and arguin'?
About what?
Come on! You know about what.
Gosh, Nellie, I can't change things,
when I've been thinkin' about it for years, overnight.
I wouldn't ask you to.
But you don't like it.
I don't like it at all.
I think it's stupid and it's dangerous.
Ain't we supposed to fight?
Ain't all marrieds supposed to fight?
The only married people I knew well were mom and dad.
They fought now and then, but they loved each other,
and they were happy.
Good afternoon. Don't reach for anythin', boy.
Our guns are all on your wife.
You ride on up to me, little lady.
Now, son, you just ease up.
We've heard about both of you.
Your pretty little wife's not gonna get hurt,
unless you decide to cause us trouble.
We're just gonna borrow her for a little while.
It'll be best for you to just sit there quiet in the centre of this wash.
Count to a minute.
- You're a brave lot!
Six against one! No wonder you lost the war!
Yes, ma'am. We're brave and we're smart.
And, I'll tell you somethin' else, we're rich.
And I'll tell you somethin' else.
You're... you're bandits!
Yes, ma'am! The best!
Now, you just drop your strugglin' and do like I tell ya,
when I tell ya.
Ouch!
Now, ma'am, we're gonna pretend like we're a little bit drunk.
We're gonna sing and laugh and have a good time.
So you just sing along with us and have a good time, ya hear?
Oh, I wish I was in the land of cotton
'cause my feet stink and yours are rotten
look away, look away, get away, Dixie land...
Sing along, honeychild.
Oh, way up north they got strange habits
they breed soldiers just like rabbits
get away, get away, get away, Dixie land
Oh, I wish I was in Dixie
today, today...
Bandits! Bandits!
Bandits!
"Wanted. $25,000 reward, Jesse James, dead or alive.
"$15,000 reward, Frank James.
"$1,000 reward,
"any known member of the James band,
"dead or alive.
"Signed, st Louis Midland Railroad."
So, you see what it says here.
"Any known member."
And these two fellas in their coffins,
they're sure known members.
In the morning, Silver City is going to advance
this fine, brave young man his part of the reward.
One thousand dollars!
In a minute, our good friend George
is going to present him with a Silver City certified cheque.
And Silver City is going to collect our part of the reward,
another one thousand dollars,
as soon as the people from the railroad come in
and identify those two bandits for themselves.
I just wanted to tell you all...
- It's important! - It can wait.
George.
I hope it can wait.
All right, George, make your presentation.
Thank you.
Young man,
as president of the Silver City bank,
- it gives me great pleasure to... - Hero!
There's an acquaintance of yours outside in the street waitin' for you.
That's what I've been tryin' to tell ya.
Billy Pimple come in this mornin', heard about your poster shootin',
and damn near exploded.
- Well, are you gonna go out and see Billy, hero?
Or is he gonna have to come in here
with all these nice folks, who he ain't mad at?
Nellie, there just ain't nothin' else I can do.
- I hear you're mighty handy with them guns of yours.
Is that a fact?
Well, I... I reckon a fact's a fact.
Heh. Now, that's a downright shame,
'cause folks around here sorta look on me
as the number one in that line,
and I don't cater to competition.
Well, you were the gent that called me out here...
Well, boy, I guess now it's any time you're ready.
Cass! You do just like your dad did once!
Throw those guns down, turn around, and walk away,
or I shoot Billy in the back!
Who's your girlfriend?
That's my wife.
And I reckon she means it.
Ben, where are ya?
Up here on the balcony, Billy.
If that girl pull a hammer down on you,
I'd blow her husband's head clear across the street.
Ben, that girl pull a hammer down on me,
it don't make no difference what you do with her husband's head.
I'll come in from behind her, Billy.
Listen, Mr Billy.
You tell that friend over there
to... to start whistling and... And to keep whistling, or I'll...
Orville, it might have been better if you had just did it.
So whistle!
Girl!
- You'd shoot me in the back? - In a second!
Then, boy, I figure it's best you do like the little lady tells ya.
I'm too young to die.
Nellie!
You might as well just drop that rifle! I ain't quittin'!
Want me to blast him, Billy?
Ben, you just sit up there and shut up!
That crazy girl couldn't miss me if I was in a hole.
Well, this here is what you could rightly call a Mexican standoff.
Looks like one of us is gonna get it in the back.
Maybe both of us.
You got any bright ideas?
Well, it's like you said, Billy.
It's your party.
Some party.
Keep whistlin', Orville!
Oh, for God...
- Is he dead? - He ain't dead, just hurt.
Please, help us!
Somebody, please help us!
- Could somebody get the doc?
Snakes is a different thing.
Is they?
Gimme that!
Come on, honey.
Come on with Mamie, now.
Come on, honey.
Come on.
There ain't nothin' you can do.
You know, honey, this time, you came up unlucky,
but Mamie's gonna take you in the house,
and get you a nice drink...
Ginny, get a bottle!
You know, you watch your steps, now.
That's it.
Now, we're gonna take you upstairs.
You stay with Mamie,
and mamie's gonna see that everything's all right.
And then, we'll take ya home.
You, er... You got a home, ain't ya, honey?
Honey?
My husband has a father.
Oh, of course he's got a daddy, darlin'.
And we're gonna take you to him just as soon as you feel like goin'.
Come on, now.
Now, you stay with Mamie. She's gonna make everything all right.
You'll see, it's gonna be all right.
Come on, now. That's my girl.
Well, where's the liquor?
Come on, honey. Here we go.
Now, lay yourself down, honey.
Gimme that pillow. That's it.
Lay yourself down, baby.
I don't know where my husband's father lives.
Somewhere near here, but I...
Well, you know him, don't ya?
Well, now, never mind. You just lay down and rest.
We'll find him just as soon as you feel like lookin'.
Meanwhile, you got a home with us just as long as you wanna stay.
Now, you close them pretty blue eyes of yours,
and Mamie's gonna take good care of you.
Just like a mother.
Like your very own mother.
Snakes is only snakes
accordin' to which side of the fence they's on.
Well, go ahead! Say it, damn you!
Was you expectin' me to say somethin', Billy?
That boy down there, he didn't think like me.
He had hisself a woman,
and a woman like that gives a man ambition.
No matter how much she'd argue against it,
one day, for sure, he'd come a-iookin'.
Maybe next time, his guns don't slip.
And I can't afford to take no chances
on one day turnin' out to be a rabbit. Right?
Well, it was your party, Billy.
Yeah, you bet.
From start to finish.
And when a man's gonna cut down William Coutts,
better try it from the back.
That sure as hell's the truth, ain't it, boys?
Just move on out, a little farther than usual.
And keep that distance.
- Hey! Whoa-up, there!
Hey-ya! Hup! Whoa there!
Whoa there! Whoa!
- Thank you. - Been a pleasure, miss.